quinta-feira, 17 de setembro de 2026

That Gull eye sees

 It stuck to the ground as if it was glued there as if whatever material under it had melted its wings there to plastic bags and flattened food wrappers.

One tiny green yellow eye with a defined pupil looked back at me. It was like the bird had lost it’s body and yet it’s head was clean and free from death rot.
As if there was another rot inside it’s neck eating anything that came up or into the skull.
The head completely preserved in a sinister display of focused power through the one eye.
What made it unsettling was when people were absent one could observe the living seagulls dive down and surround the dead one. Circling it and bowing heads like eyes wide shut.
Crowing and wailing. Not in homage or commiseration but in deep focused worship.
As humans approached the colony would launch off and scatter.
Looking back down mockingly at the human encroacher. For the landfill was theirs.
But they didn’t launch off when i approached and continued their ritual for which I am sharing with you today.
I didn’t know whether to be offended or flattered.
The gulls stood at a strange angle as if picking up a lost transmission from their corpsed brother.
Their own eyes shone with a brightness not of this world.
There was no bickering or squabbling as the gulls slowly moved in a semi circle once to the left and once to the right.
One more bow, the gull closest to me looked back at me in one rapid motion.
Gave me a half nod and the colony took flight in an organized flight over the yonder shining pines.
Another twenty meters back stood a vulture couple. Regal and dark.
Slightly adjusting themselves under the sun.
They stood like guards of the seagull corpse.
I came within some meters of the dead seagull and greeted it as if it was living.
I bowed my head as the seagulls had done.
It’s one eye following my motions. And so I began my own solemn ritual. As if I was one of them.
Not out of ridicule, but with deep desire to tickle out whatever supernatural business was going on here.

I could feel my heart churn as the pupil followed me
I could feel my energy change into something more chaotic yet with some substantial underbelly to it. As if there was a fat spiritual energy slowly filling my gut.
The landfill became dead quiet. A greyish tinge started to affect my vision.
The vultures kicked legs and winged off in different directions.
I blinked and looked around, my sight clearer. My perception sharper.
I bowed once again.
Turned and walked back to my beat up car.
Looking at the way the sky had arranged itself. As if it had participated in the whole ceremony.
My eyes had never been clearer, my sight had never been so incredible.
Funnily enough the hunger of ambition that hampered me much in years passed now felt like it made sense.

The shape you are post pecking order

 who you thought you were perhaps wasn't you.
We live in a fantasy world pretending we can be who we want to be
When in fact we trimmed and shaped ourselves through adolescence
Under the brutal preening of jealous or malicious peers

No matter what I do to convince you
You will believe the lie that you are who you were born to be
When infact you modified many parts of yourself to fit into a nitpicking society
And not nitpicking for the better, arbitrary ridiculous trends

To let this go first you must admit your are false which you will never do
Because you have bought into the layers of false belief that make you up
You are performing when you impose your convictions
Not for me or those who question but for the fools who shaped you

Don't follow the hoofmarks

 Even the impossible became possible
we spend our lives giving ourselves over
Trying to adapt to someone elses measures
Someone elses philosophy

We quote their rubbish and flatter them colorful words
Never intending to live like they did
 Never really understanding who they were
Then blabbing like we understood them

Those that created an idea
sitting in academia waiting to be brought up in a classroom
the few real fans obsessed with their biographies
Learning their formulas and theories

Deepening the shape of their hoofmarks
in history's good mud
And thinking that shape and depth so sacred
Never examining their own weird hooves

Therefore this is not my barbecue
This is not my foster family
I am not included at the feast
I do not share the same allergies

I take my own feather ink
and curl it into my hand
Design another reality
One unlike any of yours

One that can withstand your limited understanding
and derision
Not because it's bigger or better than your cliche
But because it exists in the intangible energy

of my literary mojo
This has no known limits
Maybe inside you it is the same 

Illegal filming

 Jetting down beside the symmetrically planted pines
Only a few kilometers from town
emotion said almost
sky glowed take it in step

Down the side road out toward nowhere
Dusty embankment road
Grass said dare
river concealed by vegetation

Walking up the side
Bonified trespasser all my life
Forbidden human
But it was all a set up

As I looked behind and saw these hacks and their film crew
Not able to get a clue beyond me and my mediocre
With their t rex cameras booms and movie star children crews
Come to steal a page of my script

scribble a mainstream name and adher my anbstract 
to their sense of the world
Right up here riverside
Yes between the glistening pines

On the dusty metal road
caravans as long as buses
to park up next to the piece of the dream 
That feeds my life force

quarta-feira, 16 de setembro de 2026

The weekend fix

 Callum and Mike were in the dairy
We had to pretend we weren't doing what we were doing
Buying drugs over the counter
Designer drugs for a designer world

The trinket like sweets
thousands of artificial flavors
To become something my mind wouldn't let me be
Popping the small orange pill

and sensations would attack my brain and alllow me to feel
At last all of those things I´ve wanted to feel
All those mad thoughts giving me a sense of the ethereal
But right now I´m just scoring the drugs with Callum and Mike

The dairy owner isn't making it any easier
he says he thinks I'm some sort of outsider
who might go running my mouth and get him in trouble
I laid the cash across the counter and said there you go

Give me the drugs before your next law abiding citizens enter
and see us doing business like this>
So he gave me a small bag
surprisingly a few extra pills

I downed one and started thinking about
love, sensations and big hotels

Salad of the rose garden

 Sick and longing the voice called for fresh vegetables
As there were none
I made means to collect the edible weeds under the roses
I looked closer for something better

Nothing was to be found
So I settled down the leaves and blades of grass
Knowing full well the salad was incomplete and poor
Through my chest
Through this ribcage
In the marrow of me is a poor soul, Mother

I searched there to find something of substance to feed you with
But nothing was present
I fashioned a smile from twigs and soil
And fed you your salad

Sick and longing for more
emaciated
ribcage exposed
Lungs inflated

the thorns of the rose garden draw blood
cut us when we aim for something beautiful
Pierce out innocent fingers
We chew meager greens to stay healthy
As the roses grow lush

Through the fertilizer
ground down from failures and poor souls

Sensual naivety

 Half willing
Half in doubt
The two looked awkwardly up

The unsureness
The slight anxiety
a flavor to itself

Insecurities rose
And were quelled
As the way to love was found

Neither knew where it would all lead
The species of love they would experience
Adventure is unique, love is grand

Yet was it love that they would practice
Or just fleeitng connection
The proverbial chicken or egg

Do you learn to love through love
And thus love passionately
Or do you learn to love through self
thus love passionately

The naive sit cross legged
radiating a warm bakery
Yearning for butter

Yearning for some form of wisdom to dilute
their naivety