Solitary and humble

 In the sandpit alone
The old man said play with the other boys
Playing alone is dangerous
Safety in numbers

I spat
I had my little bulldozer in my small hands
Along the little mountain i formed with my hands
The other kids were hovering

I don't need them I said to myself
Then I saw how it all worked out
Sure enough life alone is harder
But I gained a few fans

I smoothed out the road 
Imagined where the city would be
How it would move
how it would sparkle

Glad I did stay alone
Glad I didn't join one of the silly groups
These idiots hold me back
When im Solitary I am humble

Ignoring each other

 Were you hurt by me?
Did I hurt you?
When I care.
But I can't talk.

Was there any space for me 
To get in
When you thought about it
Considered this tiny possibility

When I walk toward you
Does your heart beat faster
Do you leave that stuff behind
Organize your thoughts?

I would always plan to get through to you
But those few times I tried
It just seemed impossible
I didn't know how to get in

And so like an ousider
I skim the periphery
Rejection is an energy
I read it on your beautiful skin

As you slowly forget
That I made you feel anything

Those Devilish numbers

 The devil you don't know is waiting in the wet dressing gown
The water penetrated the towels and everything
The shower was out of control
It forces itself everywhere

There stands the devil neutral as 7

Evil as 3 as 6

The one you haven't met
calling you in at 9
toying with your mind
Trade the old one in it calls

There it stands like a tall clock

malicious like 16

That Devil unknown
 incurring all sorts of chaos
creating a life of mayhem

The amateur local

You think I don't know what yall say
It all gets to me eventually at it's height
I hear the words that come out of anxious mouths
And my advice is to shut it and be absent from my sight 

Look we sit here talking like some cheap ploy
This man ahead of me is a proper spoilt boy
He turns and tries to make conversation
I tell him to shut up and fuck off

He has little to nothing to offer
He speaks as if speaking itself was the point
As if friendliness a fine art yet he's grease
He is thickly obvious and deseperate to please

He had offered nothing yet stood telling me
His only actions showed him to be false
Along these streets, in this reality
This boy man with a weak pulse

He is young and naive 
He begs to be recognized
he does nothing for this place
And he expects to get something in exchange

For his annoying presence
I need him to know that I would reward him hefty
If he just stayed out of my business
be absent from my sight

No shower curtain nil and null

 My hands go up to touch the water as it comes down from the shower head
tears from a lifetime. That won't clean me.

The water comes out reaches the towels
It soaks them all
And wets the floor
The house will remain damp

My hands go up to adjust the jets
But it won't be adjusted

So I sit in the shower well
and let it all get wet

I cry for a decade
I let go of who I was

There is nil inside
Nil outside

There are only tears
albeit rolling slowly
Not like the jets of the shower
The bathroom is flooded

I have been performing
My value is nil and null

I was sure I was becoming something
I was certain I'd be someone

In the light of the day
I am exhaustion, tears and nothing more than these

Talking a shower in the towel room

 I've never had the pleasure
And know I get to meet my own body filth
How are you?
shower jets pretty weak aye?

Yes it's me the wseat and dirt formed today
I feel pretty good right here
I have stuck and im sticking
I plan to stay

Well i better warn you
I'm going to have to grab the soap
The sponge and several other new friends
Then you'll probably flow off..

Skidding on horseshit

 Don't lie to my face
Who are you kidding
Yourself?

Don't lie or offer something you can't
Don't skid in your horseshit long and far
I do not buy any of it.

Are you allergic to the authentic?
Can you not just tell me who are?
why try to decieve? 

You could have saved yourself time
because it's all so unnecessary
Who gives a flying fuck