Terminus and train station theory

 I have been sitting here counting the minutes
Listening for the distant signs of my train
Something that would guarantee the next chapter
The big panels and ticket machines confuse eyes

Sometimes opportunity is no further than a cattle prod
I was afraid to window shop souvenirs
I wouldn't dangle legs over the side
Or play games with any oncoming train

The platform seemed to be endless
I looked down the length
swore I could see the next station
In the distance

An empty skittles packet is pushed by the wind
It comes so close to falling off the platform
Onto the tracks below like an empty person
But it didn't fall it just scraped sharply with each gust

No wind strong enough to send it on
In this huge open structure where people wait and wait
Forgetting to question forgetting to meditate
Staring at clocks, anxiety in wallets, purses and veins 

Ariival and departure

 Train's coming in
Right time, right place
Plate of food
Arrives at table
Family grin happy listening

Train has come
Waits for you to board
The anticipation
Like love rush
Obligation squirts

It comes in smoothly braking
The smooth squeal of tracks grinding
Inviting me in
I don't get on
I miss it on purpose

Table empty
Foodless
Joyless
Absent family
It exits

One flew away

 I was at the park next to the station
Two parrots on my arm
Both precious, talkative and elegant
I sat on a park bench

I just admired the feathers
Time took it's leave for this was living
And colors of these two parrots
This hugging and mugging

Keeping my mind fed
So I kept the bird seed flowing
One of the parrots flew onto a nearby meshfence
I wanted to get up and chase but knew I could lose both

So I just watched helplessly as the parrot took off 
Flying far from us
I realized among pigeons and homeless people
I had taken my beautiful life for granted

The ball and the red card

 Shooting through the stadium, far off the ground
Bouncing once, then a raised boot brings it down
Halts it from rolling, then kicks it with gumption
It flies again free in air further than assumption

It pleads to stay up as crowd cheers
Inevitably the trajectory leads down again
Meets the grass and lands between desperate men
One side races to attack the other defend

The sprigs meet and dig into a shin
Falls next to the ball, face contorted in sting
Drama performed in referee line 'o sight
There inside a pocket coming into stadium light

Like a newborn fated to destroy careers
Lids open as eyes swell in fear
Shoulders tremble arguements discarded
Rising up between fingers, the red card

Teach me the ideal kindness

 Teach me
How to give back to myself
Make me generous for tomorrow
Remind me kindly to be grateful

I want to give that ideal kindness
Sometimes I lose faith
Then I feel you repace it
But God, it's not you

I should push this together
Build something out of it
Real evidence i search for
You tell me I don't need to

Teach me 
How to get on with these others
The ones I suspect are phony
completely false

To want the world

 Its not enough to want the world
For I would like even more
Its not enough to change your mind
This way that way what should I guess

Talk about like its sealed fate
Like theres no chance involved
that is just a set progression
Then I see you pray steady

palm on palm
I want to won the whole mountain
I'll never sell the farm.

The world through a tangerine skin

 Orange peel tiny little polished dents 
covered yellow and green outside
Stringy white skin waste within
Each piece has been consumed

The ripped mess on the table
Once contained something juicy
Now dry and webby
completely empty

I look at how the skin holds itself up
Somewhere in the middle something golden once sat
That could kill thirst and attempt satiety
I tip it into the rubbish bin for the hollowness troubles me