Oh God I'm afraid to drown here
I feel humiliated infront of these people
Am I to take on water as they just observe me
God is there not another way to leave the world
Fear stuns my bones
I cannot move father
They will drown me here until my last breath
It will be forced to dissipate with me
I will be no longer
whatever remains will go to you
Humbly and awkwardly
amaciated infant
I don't want to drown down here lord
with all my transgressions
each one a head and oversharpened teeth
screaming as I scream in these turbulent waters
Is this some sort of evolution of the spirit lord
or humming meaningless suffering that surrounds reality
slowly tapping out as the overwhelming crashing of death
stops my hopeful heart
Will there be a second for a thankyou
even in the matter of struggle and hurt
even as the aftertaste is resentment
the last breath will be gratitude
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